Impossible Freedom?

Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone to obey him as slaves, you are slaves to the one whom you obey. . . ? You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.

--Romans 6:16, 18

Ah, freedom. Such a difficult thing, really, to understand.

Many years ago, when I was teaching, there was a little boy in my class named John. John was the one who, when we made Goop, a wonderful mixture of water, Elmer's Glue and borax that resembles Silly Putty (only way cooler)-- John was the child who, when we said, "Now be careful you keep the Goop away from your hair"-- immediately his Goop was on his head. 

And the next day, John had a new haircut. 

But John and I had a special friendship. He trusted me; I was able to "rein him in" with love.

Towards the end of that school year, we planned a trip to the zoo. John's dad took me aside as we were getting ready to get on the bus and gave me a leash. You know the kind, one of those halter leashes for children.

Dad said, "John's never been to the zoo before. When you get to the zoo, you will want to put this on him. It's the only way he will stay with you."

I smiled, mentally remembered how experienced I was with these kids and  especially with John, thanked Dad-- and knew I would never need the leash for him. 

I was younger then.

So we got to the zoo, got off the bus and made our way to the gate. The zoo in my city is huge, wild and wonderful, over 3500 acres of animals and coolness.

John held my hand, his eyes grew wide with excitement at the wonder of it all. I could feel him begin to twitch, to barely squirm under my grasp.

At the first opportunity, I let go of his hand, but reminded him he needed to stay close at hand, where he could still see me.

John ran off, about ten feet from me. He looked around, anxious and wiggly. So much to see! So much to hear! So much to touch!

He ran back to me, looked at me with those wide, brown eyes and said, "Mrs. Denman, could I please have my leash?"

John couldn't handle "real" freedom. He couldn't understand what it meant to be free. Not like that. John still needed something to hold on to-- or to hold on to him.

We can be like that, too, when we begin to question what we learned as children. 

Maybe one day something happens and we realize:We don't have to believe what we'd always been taught in Sunday school if we didn't want to. We were free! Free to believe or not to believe, in whatever fashion we saw fit!

But sometimes, as we turn away from our upbringing and decide we no longer want to be slaves to those "elementary school beliefs," we find ourselves getting all tangled up and anxious in our new-found freedom.

Truth? I am not convinced that it is possible to be completely free. I think it is possible to change the ideas and beliefs to which we are enslaved.

And over time, with careful thought and examination, we discover what is really going on-- for us-- in our relationship with the Almighty.

Like John, we look around and realize there is just too much going on. And we seek to tether ourselves to someone we can trust, someone we know will keep us in line-- with love.

Are you wandering or wondering what you believe these days, as politicians try to tell us what is "right" and "wrong," and the words attributed to a supposedly loving God sound mean and angry?

Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater. 

Listen to your heart. 

Listen to the Lord, and taste what is good-- and your soul will delight in the richest of fare (Isaiah 55)! 

And in this new freedom from what has bound us, may we be loosed and tethered afresh to a new leader, a new lover. 

Loving Lord, thank you for showing us a better way. Thank you for keeping us bound by your love, leading us to feel truly free in a whole new way. Amen.